There is a class of insecticides called neonicotinoids, of which, ah, an active ingredient called imidacloprid has been banned in some countries in Europe because of its association with damaging, ah, pollinators. It has a tendency to, at least in the European data, to have the bees forget how to get home. And so this is one of the components that we’re seeing here. And these neonicotinoids and imidacloprid is used pervasively in agriculture in the U.S. Primarily it’s a systemic. So it does what it’s supposed to do on harmful agricultural pests but it’s working its way through the plant up into the flowers and getting into the nectar.
—Jerry Hayes, chief of the apiary section at Florida’s Department of Agriculture
Bees On Their Knees (Living on Earth, via Daily Grail)
And if it’s affecting the bees that way … and it’s being used on our food …
Hey, maybe this explains something about American politics.
(Bee costume image from Akron Design, where there are many, many more.)
Prveiously ‘varked: BEES
There’s an easy solution. Ban the pesticide and blame the greens for the bee die-off. You see, the greens wussified the bees with their tree-hugging moral relativism, which is why the pesticide was able to kill them. So the ban is actually their fault too.
Spinach or kale? Or—dare I mention it?—arugula?
After lying in the dark for awhile with a stone on my chest, I realised I should clarify.
GREENS: A TAXONOMY IN PROGRESS
Spinach: Frozen blocks purchased automatically each week out of a vague sense of necessity. Inevitably served mushy. Despised.
Kale: Filthy and tough. Needs the hell washed out of it and the hell cooked out of it to make it edible, but when it’s done right, this is what it’s all about. A ham hock for added flavour is almost always welcome.
Arugula: Hi! I’m a plastic tub of expensive, prewashed salad! Martha Stewart told you to eat me!
It’s all my fault :-( I was thinking of the Broccolinarian Tendency, which is green in color only, and cruciferous in outlook, not unlike Kale. I’m not familiar with the Arugalists, but them seem a little unsavory and Martha Stewart’s involvement is the the kiss of death. I have to confess to being a sworn foe of “Spinach” — hence the gratuitous scare quotes — for precisely the reasons you’ve outlined. But the major foe, the dread, the FEAR, comes almost exclusively from the soi disant Brussel Sprouts. Their exponents should try it on someone else, Because as we all know, there is no Brussels. It’s a hoax.
I SAY IT’S SPINACH, AND I SAY THE HELL WITH IT
still the best new yorker cartoon ever