This paper has arisen as a direct reaction to Allwood 1976. In his thesis, Allwood tries to show that human beings are rational and cooperative and that this is particularly true of them when they talk. This, of course, is utter nonsense. Such an absurd view can only be the result of the author’s complete neglect of all serious research in the study of human behavior, such as the work of S. Potter and C.N. Parkinson. I now want to show that human communication behavior is not guided by any principles of rationality and cooperation but rather by the UNIVERSAL PRINCIPLES OF PARANOIA.
Conversation as Paranoia (Lingua Pranca, June 1978)
Previously ‘varked:
It’s pretty good, but it’s also a good way to get eaten. Not to belabor the obvious, but if they’re close enough to talk, they’re close enough to either transmogrify and eat you themselves, or to lure you into the Unclean Maw of you know who.