Time to switch polls. Here are the results of the last one, with 36 total votes.
To find stupid quizzes to tell me WHO I AM: 0% (0)
Music and/or videos: 0% (0)
Ranting and sweariness rock my world: 0% (0)
I’m relieved that no one is relying on stupid quizzes for self-knowledge. I’m still gonna post music and videos and rant and swear sometimes, though.
I am so incredibly stoned right now: 3% (1)
Had nothing better to do: 3% (1)
Duuuude!
To find stupid quizzes to distract me from reality: 6% (2)
I’m lost, man: 6% (2)
Weird news: 6% (2)
I just wanna know what you’re listening to and which books you’re reading and what movies you’ve been watching and … yeah, I’m cyberstalking you: 6% (2)
A deep-seated need for surprise and/or dismay: 6% (2)
Bunny rabbits are cute and/or tasty: 6% (2)
Okay, lemme just agree here that bunny rabbits are indeed cute. And tasty!
I hate America: 11% (4)
Avoiding work: 11% (4)
Hey, try to be more positive. Instead of hating America, work to fix what you think is broken about it. Instead of avoiding work, do something you love. At least on, I dunno, alternate days.
And the winner is a tie:
Voices in my head told me to monitor this blog for further instructions: 19% (7)
I refuse to answer, because Dick Cheney is watching my every move: 19% (7)
So there you have it. Most readers of the Aardvark are either delusional in need of guidance (PAYPAL ME A DONATION, BECAUSE MY PLAN FOR WORLD DOMINATION REQUIRES CRUSHED WALNUT SHELLS AND FEED CORN; FURTHER INSTRUCTIONS TO FOLLOW) or paranoid very alert. Maybe both.
Oh, yeah—there’s a new sidebar poll about food or something.