Exploding Aardvark

Several hundred Japanese teachers have been punished for refusing to sing “Kimigayo” since the Tokyo Metropolitan government issued a directive in 2003 instructing high school teachers to stand and sing the anthem at school ceremonies.

The parody of “Kimigayo” making the rounds on the Internet offers one solution by providing English lyrics that sound enough like the Japanese original that casual listeners could not tell the difference.

Parody of Japan anthem spreading as protest (Reuters)

Here’s the original anthem and a translation, courtesy of Wikipedia:

The Reuters article doesn’t mention that at least one newspaper is reporting that the parody is a song about “comfort women”:

Kiss me, girl, your old one. Till you’re near, it is years till you’re near. Sounds of the dead will she know? She wants all told, now retained, for, cold caves know the moon’s seeking the mad and dead.

On the other hand, it looks like any number of English-language parodies may be floating around. Just now I found:

Give me gum and you are one
Chew your knee, yea, chew your knee
thousand days, yea, she knows
You are older, no return
Volcano, Monsoon, Mother

… and this one, my fave:

Kiss me guard you are.
Cheese your need. Watch your need.
Thousand rain wish we know.
We are not bunny tail.
Volcano mouth to murder day.

My Mainichi Shimbun feed just presented me with a fresh story on a retired teacher who was fined for asking participants in a graduation ceremony not to stand up for the anthem. At least they didn’t throw him in jail.

If you’re curious what “Kimi Ga Yo” sounds like, here’s a YouTube link to a serious treatment at a sporting event, and here’s a far more rockin’ version.

Tangentially related: There is a TV show devoted to finding song lyrics in other languages that sound like Japanese phrases (soramimi). Here they make fun of a Cannibal Corpse song. I have no idea what they’re saying, but it’s funny anyway.